Oh, for a Christmas with Mum's Old Soda Siphon and a Box of 'Bombs'

Summary

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Ihate Christmas. I can't stand the music. (Do they Know It's Christmas? played on rotation on the radio makes my ears bleed. No, they don't know it's Christmas because most of the people living in ethiopia are MUSLIMS!) I hate the food, and the fact that Marks & Spencer has moved all the normal stuff to make way for the pre- trimmed Brussels.

as a child, the arrival of the special double edition of Radio times was heralded in my house like the Second Coming (it always had a lovely illustration, not a photograph). But the last Christmas special that was any good was the Office festive double bill, way back in 2003.

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Extract

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Oh, for a Christmas with Mum's Old Soda Siphon and a Box of 'Bombs'

I hate all the perfume ads on tV; as the buffed models frolic in the surf, I wish they'd drown, or get eaten by sharks.

I hate shortbread, and dried fruit, and mince pies, and brandy butt...

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