Piers Morgan's 100 Celebrities ; 36-Page Special Supplement (by the Man Who Really Knows)
Mail on Sunday › March 07, 2010
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Summary
G100 HEATHER MILLS
I know what you're thinking: what the hell's this mad, greedy, deluded old bint doing on this list, particularly after all the fertiliser I've dumped on her shameless head since she took Sir Paul McCartney to the cleaners? Well, the answer is, every generation needs a celebrity everyone can loathe. And Ms Mills, despite all her desperate efforts to persuade us what a misunderstood little charity- working angel she is, perfectly crystallises the problem with modern 'stars'. She genuinely couldn't understand why McCartney, the brilliantly talented writer of Yesterday and Hey Jude, got more attention than her, the brilliantly talentless Heather Mills, writer of nothing but bleating letters of complaint to newspapers and divorce lawyers. I, to my eternal shame, introduced her to Paul, a decision that eventually cost him Pounds 24 million for four years of married hell. In a shriekingly abusive phone tirade after I took her to task for her disgraceful gold-digging, she suddenly went silent, then said in that cold, flat Geordie accent so beguiling to billionaire Arabs in the Eighties, 'I know what this is all about. You're a Paul fan, aren't ya?' Yes, dear, I am. So's everyone else, which is why we found your antics so sickening. Yet I now find Heather's mere existence a source of endless amusement. Who else could bang on about having privacy and her disability struggle all the time, then enter Dancing On Ice? Miraculous!See the full content of this document
Extract
Piers Morgan's 100 Celebrities ; 36-Page Special Supplement (by the Man Who Really Knows)
Age 42 Born Aldershot, Hampshire Education Usworth Comprehensive Homes Hove and Peasmarsh, East Sussex; New York; London
Age 45 Born Watford Education Chester City Grammar School; Chester College; Liverpool Polytechnic Homes LA; Radlett, HertfordshireG99 VINNIE JONESI couldn't leave him out. When a guy goes from hod-carrier to football hero to movie star, then you just have to doff your hat at him. Vinnie's always been the same - a rough, tough, hilarious, enthusiastic trier. And it's worked for him big time. If only all celebrities played the game as well as he does.G98 DELIA SMITHBecame twice as interesting as a celebrity after that hilarious 'let's be 'aving you' half-time rant at Norwich fans in 2005. Until then, Delia seemed like everyone's favourite mum, cooking lovely meals, selling very nice books and being really sweet on telly. But post-LBAY, she morphed instantly into everyone's favourite naughty auntie, the one who grabs the karaoke mic at Christmas and starts belting out Sweet Child O'Mine at the top of her voice after too many sherries. Whether Delia is happy about all this remains a mystery, though I suspect not. But there's no doubt it made her more interesting. And in terms of whether she 'matters', look no further than her book sales, which continue to be astronomical. If Delia says 'buy sprouts', then the country. buys sprouts. If Delia says 'use eggs', chickens expire from exhaustion from John O'Groats to Land's End. She is the High Empress Of Middle England Cuisine.J97 JK ROWLINGShe's sold over 400 million copies of her Harry Potter books, and also the movie rights for some of the biggest-grossing films in history, creating a global brand that's worth an estimated Pounds 7 billion, making her over Pounds 500 million personally; she's won squillions of awards; and she was even named the 48th most powerful celebrity in the world by Forbes magazine. So Ms Rowling definitely matters. She would hate to be called a celebrity, and guards her private life intensely, so she doesn't play any part of the celebrity game. And that's why I've marked her quite far down my list. But by encouraging children to read, feel inspired and be creative, she has had a greater impact on the world than most of the other names on it.96Age 83 Born London Education Wyggeston; Cambridge University Home RichmondG96 SIR DAVID ATTENBOROUGHOne of my favourite memories of any celebrity is meeting this great man backstage in the green room for Parkinson, when we were both guests on the same show. We chatted for a while, and he was polite and courteous. Then I casually asked him what moment in his career he would most like to relive if he got the chance. And suddenly his eyes lit up, his body tensed with excitement and a huge flashing smile enveloped his face. 'Oh, the bird of paradise,' he replied, sighing with pleasure as he relived the seconds when he finally got to see that majestic creature open its full, dazzling wingspan. 'It was the most wonderful thing I've ever seen.' And in that moment, I saw a glimpse of the incredible passion that Sir David has for his work. And that passion has translated into a succession of sensational TV series that have taught a whole generation more about the planet and the life forms that occupy it than any textbook could ever come close to doing. He's also a quite superb technician at the craft of making films. They're always beautifully shot, and done with such mind-boggling patience, enthusiasm and heartfelt love and fascination for the subject matter. Attenborough doesn't just matter; he's more important than that.95G95 SIENNA MILLERNeeds a hit. That, in a nutshell, is the only thing stopping Ms Miller from becoming a truly big movie star. Because she can act, looks the part, and now that she's back with Jude Law, she has the perfect celebrity partner to land all the magazine covers once again. But if she doesn't do the numbers at the box office, then she'll quickly end up being a celebrity for the sake of being a celebrity, and that way rack and ruin lie. Was due to play Maid Marian in Ridley Scott's new blockbuster Robin Hood, starring Russell Crowe, but dropped out just before filming started. Not a propitious career move.Age 28 Born New York Education Heatheld (private); Lee Strasberg heatre ilm nstitute Home LondonA94 HOLLY WILLOUGHBYFew things have made quite such an impact as Ms Willoughby's breasts in the past two years. They are the biggest TV stars to emerge on the scene since Erica Rowe invaded the pitch at Twickenham and showed the nation what a real 'up and under' was all about. But, unusually, they're also attached to a smart cookie whose cheery demeanour on This Morning belies a feisty, independent mind, and an ambition that knows no bounds either on or offscreen. If one of the criteria for this list is 'fulfilment of promise', that's what we're seeing in the gentle but steady flowering of a TV presenter with real longevity ahead of her. She's warm, ...See the full content of this document
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